第一章    關于高中里的十七歲

　　我的十七歲并不光彩。

　　沒有臺劇里演的那么甜蜜沒有韓劇里的感情那么要死要活，卻是真真實實的讓我看到了社會，看到家中的沒落。

　　我想，寫下這些話也許很丟丟自尊吧，這是家丑，所以不能外揚。

　　我想，我只是匿名記下了我青春中灰色的一筆。

　　唯有憋屈。憋屈。我就像一只蛆。無力掙扎扭動被人踩死，或者置之不理。

　　我十七歲。

　　在我十三歲時，我認為我的十七歲很美好。

　　在我十五歲時，我認為我的十七歲會比現(xiàn)在好。

　　我十七歲了，我遇到了別人不一樣的十七歲。

　　啞然失笑。

　　除夕夜，來討債。

　　開學之際，租房。為了所謂的綁架，得離得遠遠地。

　　這一切我就這么眼睜睜看著。

　　我想扛起來幫你們！

　　這樣，我開始讓自己變得強一些，我不斷不斷不斷地鍛煉自己廢柴骨架子。

　　終于，我能撐起了自己的一片涂鴉下的藍天。

　　還是不行，還是不行

　　后來，我動了一直不敢動的剃須刀。

　　也許這樣就是男人了。

　　結果還是太愚蠢了。

　　幼稚。

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